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7 Ways to Improve Your Self-Confidence

7 Ways to Improve Your Self-Confidence

Christine Arylo | Divine Caroline

November 01, 2010

4. Know What Makes You Happy
Stop trying to fit into the expectations and ideals that outside forces—society, family, work, friends—have said you “should” be in order to be successful, happy, and accepted, and start asking yourself, “What really makes me happy?” Think about the times that you’ve been happiest. Who were you being? What did you have? What were you doing? Do the same for your most unhappy times. Compare the two to your life today and notice the gaps. Happiness breeds confidence.

5. Have an Opinion and Express It
Know what you believe and don’t be afraid to express it. Confident people have convictions that come from inside their souls, minds, and hearts. They know their truth and are willing to stand in it, even when what they have to say makes others uncomfortable. Know your truth in all situations and share it with pride and conviction, knowing that your unique voice deserves to be heard just because you’re you.

6. Never Apologize for Being You
Unfortunately, the world is full of people, including our inner mean girls and inner bullies, that want to keep us small, playing along and being “good” girls and boys. When you listen to them by apologizing for who you are, or by discounting your contributions, thoughts, and feelings, you squash your self-confidence. Be brilliant. Be you. And never apologize for it.

7. Spend Less Time in the Basement, More Time in the Penthouse
We all have emotional triggers, things that evoke an overly strong feeling and reaction—anxiety, anger, worry, shame, despair, fear—especially during times of stress. Your job is to notice when you have one of these basement emotions that erode your confidence, and then to get yourself back up into the penthouse where emotions like trust, peace, love, joy, and happiness live. Have your hard emotions, just have them and move back on up to the penthouse, where the view of your life is much better!

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